Whilst having a casual browse on Google - meaning I was googling myself (come on, we've all done it) - I found this discussion on Uranus.fi, and I have to say I was absolutely shocked! The conversation seems to have been going on for about five years, and is full of negative, seemingly bitter, comments about Finland and Finnish people. Some people were making quite scary suggestions about this country being a fascist police state, which I don't really know about but still find to be slightly outrageous, but some of the comments made about Finnish people were unbelievable.
If you knew absolutely nothing about Finland and then read those messages you'd be lead to believe that Finnish people are essentially bitter, evil, alcoholic neo-Nazis who hate anything non-Finnish, refuse to accept any kind of multi-culturalism, and possess no redeeming qualities whatsoever. Based on my own experiences with Finnish people I have found the opposite to be the case.
Many people there seemed to be complaining of feeling lonely and isolated. Fair enough, I think that would be an inevitable part of moving to any new country with a different culture, but most people there seemed to blame this completely on the personalities of Finnish people. Apparently they forgot that every single person has their own personality. Of course, wherever you go, there will be unfriendly, disinterested and intolerant people, but the people discussing this were implying there was some kind of collective personality which applied to every Finnish individual.
I found many of the comments to be completely ludicrous. I have not found it insanely difficult to make friends here, and the vast majority of people who I consider to be friends here are Finnish. I only know two or three people from other countries. Several of the friends I have now contacted me through e-mail or Facebook after reading this blog, telling me they lived in Turku and inviting me to do things with them or asking to meet me. Why would such cold, unfriendly people be initiating contact like that?
It certainly wasn't because they wanted something from me. On the contrary, all the Finnish people I know have been willing and eager to help me with both personal stuff and the boring official stuff which is hard for me to handle on my own, without expecting to gain anything in return. These people have gone out of their way to assist me in multiple ways. A lady who lives in another city, and who I will probably never meet, sent me two packages of cutlery and oven gloves, just because I needed them and she didn't. One particular person I met through this blog shortly after I came here has acted as my friend, babysitter, and translator, despite having her own life and problems to deal with, and she has never complained once. She is among a number of people here who have done more for me than I could ever have expected or asked for, and even when this experience is over, I will remain forever grateful to them for giving me so much help during a difficult time. They all know who they are, and they can be sure that if they ever need the favour repaid I would not hesitate for a moment.
Another point made several times in that discussion was that Finnish women are apparently extremely wary and jealous of foreign women, whether they are single or not, and that Finnish women have directly told foreign women that they feel this way. Since coming to this country I have been both in a long term relationship and single, and I know single and attached women here, so I think I can view this from all sides. I can honestly say that no woman I know here has ever acted jealously towards me or seemed to be threatened by me. The ones with partners have never been irrationally suspicious or jealous about me talking to or being around their boyfriends, nor have single women acted like I'm out to steal all the Finnish men from them. If anyone has had these feelings towards me, they've disguised them very well and deserve an Oscar.
Other comments were made about Finns, particularly men, being incapable of having a committed, loving relationship. I only have one person to judge that on, and that didn't exactly work out right, but I'm not going to claim that every Finnish man is exactly the same. I suspect that that is what some of the ladies making those comments were doing - one relationship went wrong so they made a sweeping generalisation. Realistically, as in every country, there will be some men who are no good and some who are wonderful. The other Finnish men I know with partners seem to be doing well enough when it comes to maintaining a good relationship.
I have also met a few people who I found to be unpleasant. However, that would happen anywhere, and the number of pleasant people I have met far outweighs a few people who I disliked.
At least a few people in that discussion seemed to be a bit more positive towards this country and its people, but they were clearly a minority. It's inevitable that some people will have negative experiences here, but it was so strange that the comments made were vastly different to my own experiences and conclusions. I think it's very sad that those people have such a miserable and hateful point of view, and it's very ironic that alongside these narrow-minded generalisations many of them complained about Finnish people being racist and intolerant. Why they remain in this dreadful, secret-police riddled country with these evil bastards is a mystery to me. It's a shame that these ideas are being touted on the internet because there already seem to be some misconceptions about Finland. I have been asked by English people how I got the right to live in a "communist soviet country." They weren't joking either.
Bloody hell. All of this has exhausted me a bit, but I was too shocked to not mention it. I was just going to watch a film and go to bed, I have to get up early in the morning to go to Kela.
One thing that i true about Finns is that they like to complain, especially when anonymous. Another thing worth taking into account is that a sample of people posting on the web do not correspond to any real life population. The introvert, difficult and cynical tend to be overrepresented on the Internet. ;)
ReplyDeleteYeah, Finns may come off a bit short in self-esteem but will make up for it with determination and honesty. Some shells might be a bit harder to penetrate though. :)
I think the people complaining were mainly foreign, although only a few of them stated where they came from. Some Finnish people did contribute to the conversation, but were mainly being angry at what people were saying, which was quite understandable.
ReplyDeleteI did wonder how many of the people complaining were the difficult kind of people you mentioned, and how many of them had made a genuine effort to integrate and adapt to Finland's culture. I think Finnish people have been accepting of me because I respect that this is not England and that things are different, I make an effort to speak Finnish whenever I can, and I do not expect other people to do things that are strange or unusual for them just because it would make me feel more at home. I have a job, even if I'm not needed there very often, but I am happy to work, I would rather work more often, and I pay taxes without complaining about it. I have never expected things to be handed to me on a plate, unlike so many immigrants in Finland, England, and probably also many other countries. I wondered how many of those people could honestly say the same thing, and whether that affected how Finnish people treated them. It makes sense to me that people are less willing to make an effort for a foreigner who comes to their country, doesn't contribute and doesn't try to fit in.
I'm not saying that those people are right, but they have most likely been living in Finland a lot, lot longer than you. You are clearly in the famous honeymood period.
ReplyDeleteGo try and get a job. Spend 5 years studying the language and studying for a career and STILL go try and get a job. It'll be almost impossible for you to get one. That's why they are bitching. You had a job handed to you and most foreigners in Finland are not that lucky. You are an extreme exception to the rule. Once you have had one job, things are fine. Most foreigners never even get that one first job and they do try.
I understand you are shocked, but you are passing judgement on something deeply outside your experience no matter how experienced you think you are after 6 months in Finland.
1.) I have never presented myself as any kind of authority on Finland. In two days I will hve been here for five months, I know I'm not an expert. I was only stating how contrasting this was to my own experiences here. I'm not sure why you keep referring to jobs, my points were about the personalities and behaviour of Finnish people. Nothing to do with jobs. Yeah, maybe I have just got lucky with the people I know, maybe everyone else in Finland is an arsehole, but based on the people I've met I disagree entirely with the comments that were made.
ReplyDelete2.) Don't start telling me how hard it can be! Yeah, I got a job easily, but it's so irregular that I haven't been needed there since December, so I'm hardly raking in money and living a luxurious life. I have tried to find other jobs and I know it's extremely difficult when your language skills aren't great. There's proof that things aren't necessarily fine once you get the first job. My only income at the moment is from selling paintings, and I'm making a pathetic amount from that, when I'd obviously prefer a stable job to go to every day. You probably don't read this blog often because if you had read some other entries you would see this has been far from easy for me. There have been plenty of times when it would have made a lot more sense to just go home. You don't have to be somewhere for a long time to get frustrated and find it hard to manage.
Also, just noticed your suggestion that I'm in the honeymoon period - you realy have no idea. The honeymoon period was about 2 weeks long for me. You might want to find out more about my experience here before you make assumptions about it, it's been probably the most difficult months of my life.
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